Cabin fever is now rivalling the dreaded C virus as a possible cause of death.  Being self isolated in the house with waves lapping at the door from the never ending rain has led to that most dangerous of occupations – thinking.  One result of which is that I have sent a couple of savage emails having long since passed the point where I had the mental strength to turn a blind eye to complete incompetence.

Another consequence of the wetness has been that the shed door lock has seized up, again, preventing access not only to my heated seed germinators (High time to get those broad beans going) but also to the red wine stash.  Thank God that the local lock-related Saint was able to rush round and after two hours working waist deep in mud, in a monsoon, in pitch darkness, was able to open the door.

I considered £80 a small price to pay but it did lead me to muse on how much I spend on just maintaining Stuff.  This is the second time the shed has repelled invaders, the front door has devoured keys on more than one occasion, as have the sliding doors on the balcony; I could have had a Greek holiday for less money.  (What is it with keys?  Is it built in obsolescence? Did you know they only lasted six months?).

Also this week a bill of several hundred pounds for servicing the car.  Another couple of hundred pounds on carpet shampooing, window cleaning and the weekly cleaner.  It’s amazing how filthy the house starts to look when you spend a lot of time indoors.  Add to this the cost of two vacuum cleaners and industrial quantities of cleaning materials and a week in the West Indies becomes a distinct possibility.

Whilst I don’t count myself strictly as ‘stuff’ I still attract huge maintenance bills.  Hairdresser, manicurist, pedicurist, eye-brow technician to say nothing of the ten grand it cost me to get my spine sorted out when the NHS was a bit too busy to bother. And don’t start me of what I spend on the dentist each year.

Even if I want to get rid of things it comes at a price.  Part of my huge council tax bill goes on dustmen, there are waste water charges, £60 a year for green waste and separate charges for the collection of ‘large items’.

Its a miracle that there is enough disposable income left to eat.  Just having Stuff is burning through money, and what I don’t spend on maintaining it goes on contents and  car insurance.

I am beginning to think that the way forward is just to have a huge bonfire and get rid of all of it.  (Suggestions needed on how to do this without releasing tons of carbon into the air.  Obvs). With the money I save I would hardly ever be in the country, much less in the house and I would just take Uber’s everywhere.  Result!

I hope the above illustrates where thinking leads.  As I have said so many times before,  it’s not a good thing.  Roll on the better weather.